This is Thin Privilege

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I know this was awhile back ago, but you posted 

Thin privilege the joy of being carried over the threshold by your new spouse.

And you did say you wanted to be called out… This is not an example of thin privilege. This is actually ableist and sexist. The whole tradition of a husband carrying his wife over a threshold is rooted in sexism. 


Mod response: Duly noted, though I don’t want to negate the importance that being carried over a threshold holds for the person who contributed this, and their frustration that a traditional symbol of being newly married has been reserved for thin people. 

You’re right that it’s a tradition rooted in sexism and is inherently ableist. So are many traditional Western marriage ceremonies (veiled bride being walked by her father down an aisle to be handed off to the husband, for instance). Yet many people who have been historically barred from having a traditional marriage ceremony want to be able to marry in that or a similar way. We can critique their desire to be married traditionally all we want, but it doesn’t negate the fact that it is their desire to be married that way.

That is a really old post, and was published because I think it illustrates how popular cultural symbols are defined by and sometimes reserved for the thin (as traditional ‘femininity’ and ‘masculinity’ is heavy on tiny-helpless-woman aided in all things by big-strong-man). People might say, “Well that’s not thin privilege because fat women aren’t being culturally prevented from being carried, they’re just too heavy!” The point is that the tradition itself is built on the image of a thin woman being carried by a necessarily larger man. The tradition itself privileges thinness and ties it to femininity. It’s sexist and sizeist and ableist in one disgustingly neat package.



Also, as long as we’re mentioning it, really really heteronormative.