This is Thin Privilege

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Hi! I saw the post on J. K. Rowling and how she feels about fat people, and since you haven’t read Harry Potter, I thought it might be a good idea to bring up some links that talk about it a bit more in-depth. My friend did a review of the early chapters of Harry Potter (linked above) which has a good discussion of how often fatness = bad in HP. This link also talks about it a bit: http://bugchat.tumblr.com/post/78486464108/casual-reminder-that-harry-potter-had-a-lot-of and this link talks about it specifically in relation to the Dursleys: http://kataphatic.wordpress.com/2009/08/25/dudley-dursley-and-the-over-indulged-fat-child-straw-man/

In response to: Do you feel an obligation to society to be healthy?

Superthin person here (size 0 or 00) and I don’t personally feel an obligation to be healthy, but many people tell me I should. I experience food policing both ways - those who tell me I need to eat more and those who tell me they don’t want to see me eat to much and “lose my figure.” My thinness is completely genetic as I have a very fast metabolism and need to eat nearly 2500 calories per day in order to not lose weight. However, people (I would say predominantly straight cis men) try to tell me not to eat too much under the assumption (I suppose) that I must be on a diet/starving myself to stay so small and it is somehow their job to keep me that way.

I met my boyfriend in 2013 in the beginning of the year. At the time, although I was still large, I had lost some weight before I met him, so my partner had never seen me at my heaviest. I gained the weight back during the time we have been together. I was very sad about this but it did not change his feelings nor the dynamics of our relationship. Actually he told me that what I wanted to do with my body was my business and he loved me and found me beautiful regardless.

Well today, I was showing a coworker, who I really respected, my family photos and then I came across a picture from when I had weighed less. He looked and said to me “Oh, so that’s what attracted your guy.”

I replied with “My boyfriend is still very attracted to me.”

He kind of smirked and said “That’s good” but it was with a sarcastic tone.

It really hurt my feelings because I felt as if he were saying that I wasn’t worthy of my boyfriend as I was. He is white, tall, and thin and so me being a person of color, short, and large I know we are quite different from each other but I never felt bad about it. However, the rest of the day I felt sad and questioned myself a lot.

Thin privilege is being spoiled by everyone around you no matter how bad your attitude is. My cousin is thin and she has everyone (‘cept me and my Grammy) asking ‘How high?’ when she says ‘Jump’. And they continue to do it even though she treats everyone like dirt. She demands to be driven everywhere no matter the inconvenience and never pays for gas. Yet she’ll bitch if anyone else does the same. She never lifts a finger to help anyone and never contributes to anything that everyone else has to chip in for. But because she’s thin and ‘pretty’ (not) everyone acts like she’s a little queen while her siblings get no such treatment.

[TW: eating disorders, weight loss talk]

I’ve lost a significant amount of weight recently due to an eating disorder. In the past few weeks, when it’s become the most noticeable, I have had three co-workers who I am not particularly close with ask me the following questions and make the following comments: “Have you been working out?” “Have you lost weight?” “You’ve gotten so much thinner! What’s your secret?” It’s super uncomfortable, because I know that they’re trying to be nice and compliment me, and I don’t know a good way to respond that acknowledges their good intentions (I do want to maintain a good work relationship) and at the same time conveys “Don’t congratulate me on this shit.” Nobody said anything when I was recovering from my last relapse and gained a noticeable amount of weight, but now that I’m losing weight again they feel the need to tell me they think my body looks better. It only reinforces what we hear all the time: thin=good, fat=bad. When I’d had eating problems before I used to say “thank you” to these sorts of comments, because it was the easiest thing to do. I now realize that that’s completely counter-productive to changing fat-phobic culture, and I refuse to do it anymore. But I run the risk of revealing my eating disorder to people who have no right to know, just because they felt the need to comment on my body. No, I have not been working out. Yes, I have lost weight. My secret is a secret. Fuck off. 

Thin privilege is never being embarrassed by your wedding photos.

I recently got married and am excitedly awaiting the arrival of my wedding photos in the post. To make the wait easier, the professional photographer I hired sent me a link to her online portfolio so I could see how some of my photos turned out.

But as I was scrolling past the albums of all the different couples, I started feeling embarrassed. Here were so many beautiful, thin, stylish couples in love. They were gorgeous. They looked like models out of a magazine! As I browsed through these strangers’ photos, I started thinking to myself: Why is my husband with me? He is a handsome man with an incredible personality. He could have any of the women in these photos! Why did he pick me?

And when I reached my own album, there was me. Big fat me. And I felt so ashamed. The photos themselves were beautiful: Very professional, gorgeous colors, wonderful lighting, etc. I couldn’t have asked for a better photographer. But I felt like the only thing letting them down was me. Big fat me. With my flabby arms, my double chins, and my chunky butt. I started feeling like I let down my husband by looking this way in our wedding photos.

This is why thin privilege is so harmful. Fat people are ridiculed, mocked, and bullied for our whole lives to the point where we start internalizing that hatred. We start thinking, “maybe there is something wrong with me. Maybe I should lose weight.”

And when I look back at photos of the important day of my life, instead of being happy, I’m embarrassed and ashamed.

I just wanted to say that I think this is a really helpful blog. As a thin person, I never gave much thought to how people that are bigger than me are treated in society. I always kind of figured everyone was treated the same way I was. This blog has opened my eyes to a lot of really awful things that large people go through, and it's made me realize that I'm guilty of saying some insensitive things without realizing it, and now I know better. Anyway, just wanted to say keep up the good work.

Asked by
justkeepwondering

Thin privilege is having weight gain as a side effect of birth control taken seriously.

I’ve always been around 20 pounds overweight for my height/age. I started taking birth control and over the course of the first year being on it, I gained between 10-15 pounds. My diet and exercise routine was consistent throughout being on the pill so it was odd that I put on weight.

When speaking to my gynecologist about the weight gain and asking to be put on a different amount of hormones, she told me that it was VERY unlikely that I put on weight because of the birth control. She put the blame on me and said I didn’t exercise enough/ate too much.

My naturally skinny sister and I have the same gyno and I asked her to tell the gyno she had gained weight as well. The gyno immediately said that they could try a different pill in order to combat the weight gain. Because she was naturally thin, the gyno believed her on her claim of weight gain. But because I was already overweight to begin with, she assumed it was my fault that I had put on weight!

I kept putting on more weight over the next few months and had read online that birth control can cause cysts in both the ovaries and on the thyroid. A few ultrasounds later, a cyst was discovered on my thyroid. The cyst was so large that it was causing my thyroid to act abnormally which caused my weight gain. (The thyroid basically controls metabolism)

If my gyno had believed me initially, the problem could have been dealt with sooner. But because of my weight, I had to wait more than 10 months to find out what the real problem was. I stopped taking birth control, the cyst disappeared, and I’ve been slowly losing the nearly 25-30 pounds I put on from being on birth control for two years.

Thin privilege is being taken seriously when you claim you’ve gained weight from a medication.

atchka:

randomjenerator:

lovethyfatness:

[Series of texts by @fatnutritionist, which read: “People are mad at me because they ‘work so hard’ to be fit or lose weight. They have told me this explicitly. It implies that they think my rejecting the values they subscribe to can somehow take away the fitness they’ve worked for. That is totally delusional. If you’ve worked hard for fitness, no amount of fat people rejecting stigma can take that away. So this is obviously not actually about fitness, at all. It’s about the other thing they ‘worked hard’ for: social status. They DO think, and they know, that the social status they have worked hard to earn, through ‘fitness,’ can be devalued. It can be devalued if the hierarchy that rewards them is crushed. Crushed by people rejecting stigma. We can’t take away your fitness or whatever weight you’ve lost. But we can devalue those things by destroying fat stigma. So they are afraid of us, and for good reason. If fat people aren’t stigmatized, then there is no more thin privilege. Remember always, fat people: People are afraid of you because you have an awesome power - to destroy the hierarchy. If they were not afraid of losing their place in the hierarchy, they would not come after you so viciously.” All tweets were accompanied by the hashtag, #notyourgoodfatty]

Read the full thread of Michelle’s tweets on Storify.

Reblogging forever.

I love the truth bombs Michelle Allison has been dropping on Twitter. She’s a fucking BAMF.

Love this tag! Shoutout to all the good folks making their voices heard. #notyourgoodfatty #twitter

(via myhappyfat)

There was a picture posted on facebook talking about how many pets (bunnies and chicks) bought for Easter die soon after, and it suggested in the graphic getting your child a chocolate bunny instead. 

I commented how horrible it is that people get pets without doing the research of how to take care of them first, and someone else responded to me, “Even sadder we have obese children unable to care for them AND really need to put the chocolate down too.”

Thin privilege is assuming that fat people are somehow less capable of caring for their pets and also overeat constantly on chocolate. 

My friend got a breast reduction, and she weighed 115 pounds with DD breasts. The doctor told her he wouldn’t do the reduction unless she lost twenty pounds in a month. I told her to find another doctor because that very clearly put her into the underweight category. She was so desperate to stop the constant sexual harassment that she did it anyway. The doctors who do these surgeries need to get their minds in the right place and listen to the women who are asking for these procedures instead of blaming any fat whatsoever for what would obviously be a problem anyway. 

Health insurance works pretty good where I live. However, I’ve been wanting a breast reduction forever. I weigh around 220 lbs and I’m turning 20 soon. My bra size is a 95F/G (EU) or 42DD/E (US). I’ve always had big breasts, but lately it has become unbearable. I don’t have a lot of money and it’s so hard for me to find bras in my size that fit comfortably and don’t cost a fortune. They give me back pain, and they’re saggy. 

Well, I can absolutely not afford a breast reduction. I’d ask our health insurance for help, but of course one of the first things they are going to tell you if you’re not in the “normal” weight range is to lose weight. I know that for some people when they lose weight their boobs get smaller, but I’ve lost 55 lbs before and I gained it all back. It just doesn’t work for me. They’re calling weight loss a conservative measure. Well, fuck you too. I can’t be a healthy fat person who suffers from enormous tits? I’ve always had big breasts, it’s in my genes. I’d have big breasts if my weight was “normal”. Why can’t I have the privilege to improve my life drastically? Ah, right, because I’m fat. Of course.